There is a lot of talk going around right now about resolutions. Whether you should set them or not is a huge question that comes up at the end of every year. For me, I have never been much of a resolution setter, but I understand how useful they can be. And this year, I am pretty determined to make the most of 2022, given the difficulty of the past couple of years. As an introvert, that involves prioritizing myself this year. So I have come up with a list of New Year’s resolutions for introverts.
In a world built for extroverts, it can get pretty exhausting being an introvert. I get it! We are constantly trying to be whatever others want, instead of doing what makes us happy. This is especially true for me, an introvert and a people pleaser. If I choose myself, I feel selfish and guilty. If I choose others I feel drained and empty. Sometimes, it feels like I can never win.
This has caused me a lot of problems over the past year, and especially during the holiday season. With so many social obligations, it has been weeks since the last time I spent some quality time with myself when I wasn’t trying to be productive, or worrying about something I need to get done.
The way I am living now is not sustainable. So for 2022, I have set some goals for myself to change this. I have created a list of New Year’s resolutions for introverts in hopes that I can help myself and others. Let’s start this year off the right way!
1. Be Okay Saying “No”
I am the first to admit that I will tell everyone who listens that it is okay to simply say “no” to something you do not want to do, and then turn around and ignore that advice completely. Whether I am coming up with some random excuse or I am ignoring my needs for someone else’s, I am horrible at just saying “no.”
But I advise all the introverts out there to be okay with saying “no!” You should not have to do something you don’t want to do, especially if you had already set that time aside to recharge. If you don’t give yourself time to relax, your mental and physical health will suffer!
So, instead of coming up with excuses, here is how to say “no”:
- “I can’t, but thanks for the invite!”
- “I wish I could but I hope you have a good time.”
- “No, thank you!”
- “I R.S.V.P. No”
You don’t need to tell them that you are too busy walking your pet fish or working on your push-up muscles. All they need to know is that you will not be accepting the invite. Simple as that.
Check out this article on how to say “no” to social plans
2. Learn to Lose the Guilt
After saying no to a friend or family member, the guilt starts to creep in. You start to think:
- “Am I being a bad friend for saying no?”
- “Are they going to be mad at me for not coming?”
- “Am I going to lose someone that I love?”
I usually have one million thoughts just like these rolling around my head every time I prioritize myself over anyone else. But in 2022, I am doing away with those guilty feelings.
There is no need for it. If your friends and family truly love you, they will understand that you put yourself first. If they don’t, they are the problem, not you.
3. Explain my Needs to my Friends and Family
Something that is going to make all of these New Year’s resolutions for introverts easier is if the people I love understand what I need to be my best self. It will be easier to lose the guilt if I know that my loved ones understand why I am saying “no.”
Therefore, in 2022, I am going to make sure everyone close to me knows what my needs are, some examples are…
- How much time I need to recharge
- How long I can stay in a large group social interaction
- That when I say I need to leave, it is because my battery is drained, no other reason
- That I might get a little cranky when I am drained, I don’t mean to and I am working on it, but it still happens
Those are more personal to me, but I am sure other introverts have many shared experiences.
4. Get Two Hours of Alone Time a Day
When I say alone time, I really mean it. Because sometimes I can be alone, but thinking about others, and I do not feel refreshed at all.
So, in 2022, I want to strive for at least 2 hours each and every day that I spend alone, doing something I love. I can be working on one of my hobbies, watching TV, or reading. But whatever it is, I want it to be completely my own.
Not every introvert can do 2 hours a day but setting aside a certain amount of time each day for yourself is going to be beneficial in the end.
5. Set Appropriate Boundaries and Limits
Because of the way life is, introverts are bound to have friends or family that are extroverts. That’s life. So sometimes it is necessary for introverts to be in social situations.
But it is also important to set boundaries and limitations for these social situations so that your time and energy are not abused.
Here are some ways you can set boundaries in 2022:
- “I can go to the event with you, but only for two hours. After, I want to get home and rest before work tomorrow.”
- “Sorry, I can only call you before 6, after that, I put my phone on ‘do not disturb’ until the following day.”
- “Unfortunately, I can’t go to that party because I find situations like that overwhelming. But I would love to get together at the local coffee shop, where we can chat and catch up.”
Being a well-adjusted introvert in an extroverted world means making a couple of sacrifices, but they should never be at the expense of your mental health. So make it a goal to set boundaries in order to still get what you need from your relationships.
I think the best New Year’s resolutions are the ones that improve our mental health. It can be hard putting pressure on ourselves to improve in every aspect of our life at the beginning of each year, so focusing on something important like mental health is a must.
For me, being an introvert in this world has been really tough. Mix that with being a people pleaser, and you have a very stressed-out person who drinks way too much coffee, gets zero sleep and is constantly clenching her jaw! That’s me!
Hopefully creating this list of New Year’s resolutions for Introverts will give me some inspiration and motivation to prioritize myself in 2022. I want to find as much joy and happiness as I can this year, and the only way to do that is with a full battery.
Related: Christmas Activities for Introverts
